"One of my wife's cousins once paid us a short visit. I didn't have much time to spend with her, but after she had gone I said to Mrs. Carnegie, "What makes that woman so charming?" "I'll tell you," my wife said, "if you really want to know. She got you to talk about yourself." I realized it immediately. This cousin had asked me about my interest in Lincoln. I began to tell her about it. Her questions were skillful. I talked one evening until amost midnight. I had a chance to shine. She seemed so intelligent and receptive that I thought she was wonderful. What she did was observe one of the first principles of putting yourself over with other people. She showed an interest in one of my interests so she made a good impression on me."
Good Reading Rack Service, 1958